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Legendary Planeswalker - Teyo Will Kenrith +2: Until your next turn, up to two target creatures each have base power and toughness 0/3 and lose all abilities

is what I'd like to say, but there's a catch

Since Ultra Pro's new gamer pouch toy has its mouth closed in a pencil thin line, you might think my problems would evaporate, and it solves some of them, but this bit of merch is ugly in a whole new way

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If that cards converted mana cost is less than or equal to the number of experience counters you have, return it to the battlefield